Anti-Shia people often attack Shia fiqh on the issue of looking at a woman before marriage.
But when we compare the actual texts, the difference becomes very clear:
Sunni books preserve extreme minority views where Ibn Hazm is quoted as allowing looking at the proposed woman’s private part, and one narration from Ahmad allows looking at her unclothed — ‘awrah and non-‘awrah.
Shia narrations, however, speak with modest limits:
face, wrists, hair, outward beauty/figure, clothed sitting/standing, and no lust.
This post is not an attack on Sunni women or Sunni families. The point is to expose anti-Shia double standards.
Important note:
The following extreme views are not the majority Sunni fatwa. The Sunni majority generally limits the suitor’s look to the face and hands and prohibits looking at ‘awrah. But Sunni books still preserve these shocking minority statements, while anti-Shia people pretend such sensitive discussions only exist in Shia books.
- Sunni source: Ibn Hazm — direct quote about private part
Arabic:
وعن داود ينظر إلى جميعها حتى قال ابن حزم: يجوز النظر إلى فرجها.
English:
“From Dawud: he may look at all of her, until Ibn Hazm said: it is permissible to look at her private part.”
Reference:
Badr al-Din al-‘Ayni, ‘Umdat al-Qari Sharh Sahih al-Bukhari, Kitab al-Nikah, Bab al-Nazar ila al-Mar’ah Qabl al-Tazwij.
Short comment:
This is the most direct preserved Sunni quote:
يجوز النظر إلى فرجها
“it is permissible to look at her private part.”
- Sunni source: Sharh Sahih Muslim discussion — Ibn Hazm again
Arabic:
وقال الأوزاعي: ينظر إلى مواضع اللحم، وقال داود: ينظر إلى جميع بدنها [لا إلى فرجها] وقال ابن حزم: يجوز النظر إلى فرجها، وعن أحمد ثلاث روايات، الأولى كالجمهور، والثانية: ينظر غالباً، والثالثة: ينظر إليها مجردة.
English:
“Al-Awza‘i said: he may look at the fleshy parts. Dawud said: he may look at all of her body [not her private part], and Ibn Hazm said: it is permissible to look at her private part. From Ahmad there are three narrations: the first like the majority, the second that he may look at what usually appears, and the third that he may look at her unclothed.”
Reference:
Sharh Sahih Muslim discussion preserved on HadithPortal.
Short comment:
This quote gathers several extreme Sunni views:
fleshy parts, all body, private part, and unclothed.
- Sunni source: al-Abwab wa al-Tarajim li Sahih al-Bukhari
Arabic:
وعن داود: ينظر إلى جميعها حتى قال ابن حزم: يجوز النظر إلى فرجها.
English:
“From Dawud: he may look at all of her, until Ibn Hazm said: it is permissible to look at her private part.”
Reference:
al-Abwab wa al-Tarajim li Sahih al-Bukhari, quoting the discussion from Fath al-Bari / ‘Umdat al-Qari.
Short comment:
Again the same direct phrase is preserved:
يجوز النظر إلى فرجها
“it is permissible to look at her private part.”
- Sunni source: Ahmad ibn Hanbal — one narration: ‘awrah and non-‘awrah, unclothed
Arabic:
وقال داود: ينظر إلى سائر جسدها. وعن أحمد ثلاث روايات:
إحداهن: ينظر إلى وجهها ويديها.
والثانية: ينظر ما يظهر غالبا كالرقبة والساقين ونحوهما.
والثالثة: ينظر إليها كلها عورة وغيرها، فإنه نص على أنه يجوز أن ينظر إليها متجردة.
English:
“Dawud said: he may look at the rest/all of her body. From Ahmad there are three narrations: one, he looks at her face and hands; the second, he looks at what usually appears such as the neck, shins/legs, and the like; and the third, he looks at all of her — ‘awrah and non-‘awrah — because he explicitly stated that it is permissible to look at her while she is unclothed.”
Reference:
Ibn al-Qayyim, Tahdhib al-Sunan, quoted in al-Albani’s Silsilat al-Ahadith al-Sahihah and other Sunni works. Shamela preserves this wording.
Short comment:
This does not merely say face and hands. It says:
عورة وغيرها
“‘awrah and non-‘awrah”
And:
متجردة
“unclothed”
- Sunni source: Dar al-Ifta summary confirms these extreme Sunni views existed
Arabic:
وذهب بعضهم كالظاهرية والإمام أحمد في رواية عنه إلى جواز النظر إلى جميع بدنها، ما ظهر منها وما بطن، عورة كان أو غير عورة، وذكر ابن القيم بأن الإمام أحمد نص في رواية على جواز النظر إليها وهي مُتَجَرِّدَة.
English:
“Some, such as the Zahiris and one narration from Imam Ahmad, went to the permissibility of looking at her entire body — what is apparent and what is hidden, whether ‘awrah or non-‘awrah. Ibn al-Qayyim mentioned that Imam Ahmad explicitly stated in one narration that it is permissible to look at her while she is unclothed.”
Reference:
Dar al-Ifta al-Misriyyah, “What the suitor may see from the proposed woman.”
Short comment:
Even Dar al-Ifta confirms that such extreme views existed in Sunni fiqh discussions, while also preferring the majority view.
Now compare this with the Shia narrations.
- Shia hadith: face and wrists only
Arabic:
عن هشام بن سالم وحماد بن عثمان وحفص بن البختري كلهم، عن أبي عبد الله عليه السلام قال: لا بأس بأن ينظر إلى وجهها ومعاصمها إذا أراد أن يتزوجها.
English:
Hisham ibn Salim, Hammad ibn ‘Uthman, and Hafs ibn al-Bakhtari narrated from Imam al-Sadiq a.s:
“There is no problem if he looks at her face and her wrists when he wants to marry her.”
Reference:
al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 365; Wasa’il al-Shi‘ah, vol. 20, p. 88, Bab 36, hadith 25101.
Short comment:
The Shia narration says face and wrists. It does not say private parts, ‘awrah, or nakedness.
- Shia hadith: hair and beauty, but without lust
Arabic:
قلت: أينظر الرجل إلى المرأة يريد تزويجها فينظر إلى شعرها ومحاسنها؟ قال: لا بأس بذلك إذا لم يكن متلذذا.
English:
I asked:
“May a man look at a woman whom he wants to marry, looking at her hair and her beauties?”
He said:
“There is no problem with that if he is not taking pleasure.”
Reference:
al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 365; Wasa’il al-Shi‘ah, vol. 20, p. 88, Bab 36, hadith 25104.
Short comment:
The condition is clear:
إذا لم يكن متلذذا
“if he is not taking pleasure.”
So Shia hadith allows proposal-looking only without lust.
- Shia hadith: face and outward figure
Arabic:
عن الحسن بن السري قال: قلت لأبي عبد الله عليه السلام: الرجل يريد أن يتزوج المرأة، يتأملها وينظر إلى خلفها وإلى وجهها؟ قال: نعم، لا بأس أن ينظر الرجل إلى المرأة إذا أراد أن يتزوجها، ينظر إلى خلفها وإلى وجهها.
English:
al-Hasan ibn al-Sari said:
I asked Imam al-Sadiq a.s:
“A man wants to marry a woman; may he observe her and look at her back/outward figure and her face?”
He said:
“Yes, there is no problem for a man to look at a woman when he wants to marry her; he may look at her back/outward figure and her face.”
Reference:
al-Kafi, vol. 5, p. 365; Wasa’il al-Shi‘ah, vol. 20, p. 88, Bab 36, hadith 25102.
Short comment:
This is about outward appearance and figure. It is not about looking at ‘awrah or private parts.
- Shia hadith: she remains clothed, may sit and stand; walking is disliked
Arabic:
عن يونس بن يعقوب قال: سألت أبا عبد الله عليه السلام عن الرجل يريد أن يتزوج المرأة وأحب أن ينظر إليها؟ قال: تحتجز، ثم لتقعد وليدخل فلينظر. قال: قلت: تقوم حتى ينظر إليها؟ قال: نعم. قلت: فتمشي بين يديه؟ قال: ما أحب أن تفعل.
English:
Yunus ibn Ya‘qub said:
I asked Imam al-Sadiq a.s about a man who wants to marry a woman and wants to look at her.
He said:
“She should wear her waist-wrapper, then sit, and he may enter and look.”
I said:
“May she stand so he can look at her?”
He said:
“Yes.”
I said:
“May she walk in front of him?”
He said:
“I do not like her doing that.”
Reference:
al-Tahdhib, vol. 7, p. 448; Wasa’il al-Shi‘ah, vol. 20, p. 90, Bab 36, hadith 25109.
Short comment:
This is very modest: she is clothed, she may sit or stand, and even walking in front of him is disliked.
- Shia hadith: warning against lustful gaze
Arabic:
قال أبو عبد الله عليه السلام: إياكم والنظر فإنه سهم من سهام إبليس.
English:
Imam al-Sadiq a.s said:
“Beware of looking, for it is an arrow from the arrows of Iblis.”
Reference:
al-Tahdhib, vol. 7, p. 435; Wasa’il al-Shi‘ah, vol. 20, p. 89, Bab 36.
Short comment:
Shia hadith does not open the door to lustful looking. It warns against the gaze of desire.
Now ask honestly:
Where is the Shia narration saying:
“Look at her private part”?
Where is the Shia narration saying:
“Look at her ‘awrah and non-‘awrah”?
Where is the Shia narration saying:
“Look at her unclothed”?
The Shia narrations say:
Face.
Wrists.
Hair.
Outward beauty.
Outward figure.
Clothed sitting and standing.
No lust.
Beware of lustful looking.
But Sunni books preserve:
Ibn Hazm:
يجوز النظر إلى فرجها
“It is permissible to look at her private part.”
Ahmad narration:
عورة وغيرها
“‘awrah and non-‘awrah.”
Ahmad narration:
متجردة
“unclothed.”
Dawud:
all body.
al-Awza‘i:
fleshy parts.
So who is really being misrepresented?
Again, this is not the majority Sunni fatwa. But it is preserved in Sunni books. Therefore anti-Shia people should stop pretending that shocking or sensitive legal discussions exist only in Shia books.
If Sunni extreme minority views can be explained, rejected, or contextualized, then Shia narrations must also be read honestly.
The real issue is not Shia indecency.
The real issue is anti-Shia double standard.
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